When an answer is no. (Expecting vs Hoping)

Did it ever happen to you when you've been praying too much for something and still you didn't get it?
When that's the only thing you want for yourself but didn't happen?
When you've tried so much to make it real but it didn't?

It is a sad feeling.
A very sad feeling.

It's like how Bradley won over Pacquiao. (for Pacquiao fans)
It's like how Heat won over Celtics. (for celtics fans)

These are moments that so many questions will linger on your mind.

Questions such as, Where did I go wrong? Don't I deserve it? What should I do now? Why did it happen? Why God didn't answer my prayers? Why do I always fail? Why does it have to be a no? Why, why, ... never ending why and never ending questions. 

However, think more deeply.

While there are things you didn't had,
there are things you didn't hoped for but came
there are things that you didn't wished for but happened
there are things you never even imagined but transpired.

While you are bragging that life is unfair, be fair in the first place. Yes, it’s cliché, but it’s true that you must count what you have and not those you don’t have. You can never be happy if you cannot appreciate yourself and the things that you possess. So whenever you don’t succeed, whenever you get disappointed, whenever the result is not favorable to you, or whenever you feel you screwed up think of those great things that God has given you, things that you didn't really asked for but made you happy. Think of your failure as a challenge, as a motivator to make it better next time...

And these are the exact words I'm telling myself over and over. It's easy to say all these, but in reality, no matter how much you make yourself believe that it's okay, it still hurts.

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”
― Alexander Pope

That quote is just one of the many versions of saying stop expecting so you won't be hurt.   I am disappointed, but in my defense, I believe I didn't expect I just hope. And that leads me to take a step back and question the difference between expecting and hoping.

And these are what i got.

Expecting usually refers to something happening that you know will happen.
While hoping means that you are waiting for something to happen, that might never happen.

Expecting means that the consequences are already formulated and the actual occurrence is forthcoming. Hoping is wishing for something to happen

Hope is something that you desire; whereas, expectation is something that you anticipate.

And with those I realized that expecting will hurt you more, than when you are just hoping. Because when you expect, you are already living on the idea that you'll really get something you want while when you hope, you're just merely wishing and you're still aware that it might not happen.

But at the end of the day, whether you expected for something or you just hoped for it when an answer is no, you'll still feel a sting of pain. 

So sleep on it move on and start over, but this time more wisely.